Radical Relationship: Staying Present, Even When Bewildered
"If you know where you are going, if you are crystal clear on the destination and how to get there, it may be that your clarity has fooled you into thinking you have traversed worlds when you have merely substituted familiarity and intelligibility for the uncomfortable yet transformative potential of bewilderment."
-- Bayo Akomolafe
I’ve just returned from a major road trip -- a journey of being shaped and honed by the Yucatan Peninsula of Mexico. Something deep inside of me has been enlivened and transformed … My awareness of relationship has expanded and deepened into sensing kinship with Earth and all beings. My genetic plasticity has been activated; my molecules are being rearranged.
I’d like to share a bit of this emergent experiencing with you.
Beneath the surface of the Yucatan Peninsula is a matrix of cenotes – these freshwater pools and flows are part of the largest system of underground rivers in the world. Cenotes were the only source of water for the Mayan civilization and are held as sacred sites, considered to be the entrance to the “underworld,” where the gods and their spirits reside. At the very least, they exude mystery and invite deep exploration.
Like going on a first date, entering the cenote seen in this photograph takes some courage – it involves a darkened descent via a somewhat unsteady ladder with an occasional missing step and a tricky right turn. There is a final little jump onto a floating platform, and there you are … looking up to the sun shining between the trees, a black vulture sitting on a branch, and a single cloud in the sky above. Then comes the decision to plunge into the magical-blue-green water and float, gently swim, and to be held by Earth … sensing what it’s like to come home to simply being here, in this moment, in this place, in this body.
Being in conscious relationship is a very similar process. It takes courage, ignites curiosity, and opens the pathway to re-member belonging to a world much larger than our individual self. Whether the focus is conscious relationship with ourselves or with another being (human or more-than-human), fully opening to being together offers healing and transformation. Senses are awakened and we feel alive. There is a shift from the delusion of separation into the infinite potential of the matrix of kinship (or, as Robin Wall Kimmerer describes it, “kinning”).
“Life ever yearns to unfold into deeper relationship.” – Martin Lee Mueller
During the first couple days in the Yucatan, I felt something melting inside me. I couldn’t name it, but I could feel the loosening and letting go … actually, it felt more like releasing and becoming a puddle. At one point, after a particularly “twirly” time on our road trip, I made the observation, “The part of me that wants to know where I am and where I’m going has totally evaporated.” I think that’s when I surrendered to being in deep relationship with this place, with my traveling companions, and with whatever arose. I gave myself over to being fully present and, to paraphrase Rilke, to letting it all come to me. After that, I mostly just felt tender – willing to be vulnerable, to let myself be changed, to sense kinship with Life in all forms. I laughed a lot; I teared up a lot.
In kinship, we show up and engage … whether or not it’s beautiful, comfortable, convenient or what we expected. The same quality of presence and awe is evoked by seeing 3 planets in the morning sky …
… as by swimming above a reef of dying coral.
I experienced that in willingness to remain open and tender, healing and transformation occur. There is no “stepping outside” because there is honoring that there is no “outside.” There is no “turning away” because there is honoring that there is no “other.”
I found that there is opportunity to practice kinning in every moment, in every situation, with every being. This way-of-being could be called Radical Relationship. Maybe, that is what is being asked of us now … to be in Radical Relationship with all that is occurring by being willing to stay present, to bear witness, to be compassionate, and to take responsibility through conscious action. Maybe this is the shift that changes the arc of separation and destruction to collaboration and creativity. I’m thinking that it’s worth a try.
Radical Relationship, a.k.a., Kinship:
A good medicine for this time -- a practice, a way of living and being that is sourced in life-centered mutuality.
This teaching is what came home with me from the Yucatan. It is changing my life and how I am showing up in it.
Spring is a time of emergence and connection ... and, this month, MBMS is offering quite a buffet of opportunities for emergence and connection as pathways for Radical Relationship. With Mindful Ramble, Mindful Walking & Meditation, and Awaken Wonder in the Natural World, Katie invites us to slow down and notice -- really connect through our attention to the sensory experiences that we are moving through. Jenn guides us into connection with unseen guides through Journey Meditation. Looking up and/or looking in we connect deeply with ourselves and what is happening in our world, as I guide us in Contemplative Cosmology and Eye of the Hurricane. Join us for these opportunities to cultivate what the world needs now -- Radical Relationship.
Marianne
